It's been quite a while since I posted anything. In my defense, I've had a lot going on and work is draining me more than ever. Employees are dropping like flies and I hope to soon be one of them.
I had a post planned out for last week, but when my mom called me at work last Wednesday to give me the news of my cousin, everything got swept away. I sat in the back at the break table for about half an hour. The cook went out to help my customers for me while my manger helped me calm down. It seems extreme, but her passing shook me hard. Barely 30 years old and the cancer just swept her away forever. It's heart-breaking.
Since then I've been bracing myself regularly whenever she comes up in conversation. My coworkers ask every once in a while how my family is holding up, and I always have to tell them that my immediate family isn't the one I'm worried about. The pain of losing a sister and a daughter must be terrible. I am glad that I have not had to experience that, and I hope that I never do.
I'm not looking forward to the funeral tomorrow. Lucky for his own skin Matt didn't give me any trouble about needing to take off halfway through my (8-hour) shift, and ServerD (bless her) offered to come in early so there was someone there to cover me while I did my side work so I could get out on time. Her sister-in-law is also suffering from a return of breast cancer, so the news of my cousin's death hit home for her as well.
I'm not sure what to say after that, really. Getting through work tomorrow is going to be hard, and getting dressed and getting in the car will be even harder. Patrick is going to come with us, to give support where he can. We've all got pink (her favorite color) or yellow and black (in honor of her love of everything bee) to wear, and I'm going to tuck a box of tissues in the car, with a bundle in my purse as well. It will be a long, long day.
Look at me, I'm getting teary-eyed again. I wish this never had to happen to anyone so young. Excuse me while I go get myself some tissues.
Here's hoping your weekend is so much more cheerful than mine.
I'll never say goodbye
'Cause I can't forget her